Dear Mercury Casualy Insurance Company,

Fuck you.

I know I start all my letters like this, but this time I really mean it.  Your company is scum.  You will no longer be getting my business.

When I filed my claim to fix my car because it was in an accident, you were obliged to fix it or total it and give me the cash for it.  You, for some unknown reason, decided that it would be worth paying $10,000 to fix a car only worth $6500.  That seems ridiculous to me, but that’s on you.  Now that you decided to pay $9000 after my deductible rather than give me $5500 in cash, you owe me a car that runs like it did before the accident (which was perfectly).  You instead have delivered me a car with a bad vibration on the side of the car with all the damage, a door that won’t lock (again on the same side with all the damage), has heat coming out the heater vent even when the heater is off, has a tire that needs replacing because the tread is all worn off from the fender scraping when the CHP forced me to drive it for a mile after the accident, and a mis-aligned fender.

You are now trying to justify all of the problems as “normal wear and tear” on the vehicle and basically have called me a liar for telling you that none of this was a problem before the accident.

I will see your sorry asses in court.  May every one of your adjusters come down with a painful and deadly form of liver disease.

Eat shit and die.

Your ex-customer,

Othurme

(this is just a rough draft)