This should be fun.
Oh crap, Hilly, I wish you hadn’t said my name in CP’s comments.. I was really trying to avoid anything close to direct dialog with you… I figured it was better to say what I had to say here than out on someone else’s comment page. You probably stand a better chance of no one ever reading it if it sits on my unread blog.
So, I pick my friends for their honesty and integrity. I really don’t think you have been completely honest with the world since this whole thing busted open. You have painted yourself the martyr. You have claimed complete innocence when the truth is that you are just as bad as they are. Why Jester chooses to protect your innocence is beyond me when you have been such a shitty friend to him. You’re lucky to have him as a friend at all after some of the shit you’ve said and done to him. I can only imagine the stuff you must have said about him to other people because I know how you talk about other people to him.
The fact that the internet world wants to call hypocrites out onto the carpet right now and have chosen to leave you standing on the hardwood floor is funny to me. You are guilty of probably every so called crime they are, including taking money from your internet friends for a luxury item (for the record, I did not contribute money to send Hilly to Philly).
I barely even know you and I have watched you talk shit about people behind their back and act friendly and innocent to their face. I have heard more information on these internet friends of yours than most people and I get my information second hand, but I know who the real source of the gossip is.
You have never really tried to be my friend and I have always known it is because I don’t have enough readers for you to care about me. You have been dismissive of me when we’ve hung out in person with groups of other people around and you have been completely insensitive about my feelings in choosing your words in my presence. You have actually said some shit that directly hurt my feelings. The only time you have ever called me is to ask me to pick up donuts for you. Why you play so nice and innocent with others baffles me completely. Well, not really.
So, while you were still pretending to be nice to Karl… I dumped him on twitter and FB because he is shitty person. While you were still pretending to be nice to Britt and Adam.. I dumped them on twitter and FB because they were shitty people. And now? While you are still pretending to be nice to all the people in Jesterworld? I have dumped you from twitter and FB. I don’t think I need to say why.
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What I will say in her defense, for this situation, is that she was in a very difficult position of living 3000 miles away from her real life, financially dependent on not making waves, and going through a divorce which put her in an emotionally unstable place….
as for the rest of it… I’m staying out of it!
Jerry -
Obviously Paul told me about this post or I never would have seen it…not because your blog isn’t “big enough” for me but because you rarely blog anymore.
Before I say anything else, I want to say that I am truly sorry if I hurt you or offended you in the past. I just sat on the phone with Paul a little choked up because I honestly had not realized that to be the case. This post probably has hurt and stung me way more than the gossipy crap over the last week because I had no idea that I had been this shitty and wretched to you and honestly, from the bottom of my heart, I am sorry. I don’t expect you to like me instantly because I apologize but I do want you to know that I mean it.
I can be sarcastic and flippant. I get carried away and if I said things to you in person that hurt your feelings, I wish you had just told me at the time. Chances are that I would have been shocked and cried (cause that is what I do) but also I would have apologized and fixed it. My nature is to not assume people are mad at me but rather to wait for a sign or for them to tell me. I do this because I have a tendency to get too worked up over things and make myself sick to my stomach otherwise.
As for everything else….yeah, I’ve talked shit about people. No one above that you have mentioned doesn’t know that I haven’t talked shit about them. Despite what you think, Jester is my friend and I have defended him to the death, especially while in Florida. I took money to go to Philly. I allowed “blog success” to go to my head. When I got back from Florida and was told about the way I was viewed, I felt ashamed and even blogged about it. I didn’t know that I was acting that way until very good friends pointed it out though.
Like I said at CP’s, my new blog isn’t about that. I’ve been trying to center my life around being a better person and coming out of that blog fog. I have been just trying to write the best I know how and focus on that, my local friends, and my family. Yes, I’ve made mistakes. I own up to them. I’ve never said I was perfect. I just want to be a better person, that is all.
The rest is between me and Jester. I don’t like this calling people out on blog things but since you did it openly, I am replying openly. Hopefully you can see that I am not trying to hide myself here. I don’t need you to like me if you don’t want to but I am sorry that you don’t. I’m also very sorry that I never saw it coming because I would have liked to fix it.
Hilly
Jester – We are all going through some very heavy shit. You have still managed to be a good friend in spite of everything you are dealing with.
Hilly – The thing is… I shouldn’t have to tell people who aren’t my friends that they are being crappy to me. If you wanted my friendship, you had a chance to be nice to be from the beginning. You were auditioning for my friendship from the time we met. And I was for yours at the same time. Some auditions are not worthy of a call back. I’m sure there’s a good chance, I wasn’t worthy of one for you, either, because once you rubbed me the wrong way early on, I didn’t set out to impress you much either. The fact that you are acting awestruck here is also funny since Ive actually read emails from you to someone else (let’s just say it, Jester) that said “So, I guess Jerry has dumped me…” or something to that effect. It’s just another act so that on the off chance someone does read it, you will look like I just smacked you in the head with a brick and you didn’t even see it coming. I don’t need your friendship either and I never felt the need to tell you since you never seemed to miss it to begin with.
That said… I just wanted it documented somewhere that you are putting on an act… STILL and regardless of what you’re writing on your blog. You need to own more of the blame for this. You act like you had no idea Jester’s post was coming. I’ve seen you say that on one of the other comment strings going on about this whole thing thus enhancing your image of innocence. I know you knew. I know where he got his information. The fact that you’re letting him take all the heat for it is shitty. The fact that he has chosen to take heat for it is his thing. My revealing it is mine. Maybe you’ll be lucky enough that no one else will find this either and you can keep your act up. That’s actually the funniest part about this whole thing to me right now. It’s here if people can find it.
Love,
Untouchable
I’m taking the public heat. She’s taking the private heat. I’m ok with that.
Obviously I’m not. And thankfully I have a blog to post my opinions on.
You’ve made up your mind already, Jerry. No matter what I say, it honestly won’t matter. I wanted to apologize and I did.
You don’t know anything about me or my life and obviously pretended to like me for a minute while also talking shit about me behind MY back. Everyone is doing it yet everyone is pointing fingers.
I don’t need to run my blog a certain way for you. If I did that, it would be no different than me running it a certain way for the people in Florida, which from what I hear, made you call me a douchebag.
You don’t like me. I get it.
Take care of yourself. I mean it.
A) I never called you a douchebag, but admittedly have thought it.
B) I don’t talk shit about you and pretend to be your friend. I have associated with you because we have a common friend. I’m adult enough to be civil in public with people I don’t care that much about. I have, up to now, always given you the benefit of the doubt because Jester likes you. I have waited to see if one day you would actually treat me like a human being. Instead I have been reduced to you calling me an asterik and talking about me publicly as if I’m not more than someone that Jester allows to be his friend out of some sort of pity or something. I know you’ve never seen me talk about you like that or try to belittle you in anyway. If your name comes up in discussion (and it does) and I’m asked my opinion (which is usually when you’ve done something douchebaggy) I express it. If you think I’m the only one that thinks you’re a douchebag, ask around. You’ll find more. I’m not sitting around here waiting for every opportunity to bash you, though.
C) There are people in this world that deserve your apology more than me. People who actually like you even though you have treated them like complete shit (and I’m not talking about Jester).
D) I am not talking shit about anyone behind their back. It’s all right here. Why would these people care what I think anyway?. I’m nobody (especially thanks to your public depiction of me). But while I’m here saying it like it is, you’re still lying about your involvement in and knowledge Jester’s post.
It’s apparently Call-Out-A-Hypocrite Week and all that has happened here is I picked you. I just can’t watch you (on blogs and in emails) deny everything and claim complete lack of connection. You know what you’ve said to people and you know you’re lying about it. This post is simply a result of me not liking liars and hypocrites. So yeah, I don’t like you. And you get it. And I know you couldn’t care less.
I also find this funny:
At 3:30pm Hilly writes: I don’t expect you to like me instantly because I apologize but I do want you to know that I mean it.
At 5:59pm (the same day) Hilly writes: You’ve made up your mind already, Jerry. No matter what I say, it honestly won’t matter.
- – -
Instantly no, within 3 hours though it’s apparently supposed to have changed.
I so hate it when my friends don’t get along.
I understand where you are coming from, Jerry. I do. You are certainly not the only person who has seen and commented on some of Hilly’s past actions. That’s not a surprise to Hilly, either.
I would hope that this post serves as some outlet to work through your issues with each other, as neither of you are going anywhere as far as I’m concerned.
Jerry obviously needs time to be able to express an anger that he’s felt for a while. Hilly has offered an apology for a hurt that she was generally unaware of (she knew that you were unhappy with her, but not for anything specific) and hopefully some time will pass and we can all continue to celebrate the awesomeness that is me.
That was meant to be funny.
I believe it was meant to be.
Um…..I’m still reading. I know nothing about nothing regarding this post but I am glad to see you’re still around and I hope you (and your business) are doing well.
i was all excited to see a new post from you, but this sure as shit isn’t what i expected to read.
anyhow, ummmm…hi.
Hi Charming Bitch & Becky. Nuff said about that.
Wow. The things you find your name attached to when you Google yourself!
Anyhow, I don’t know you, Jerry. But, I did comment to you on Jester’s blog that I really do believe you should continue writing because you write so eloquently. While I am TOTALLY not fond of the subject matter…your writing is very beautiful and heartfelt. I can feel the pain emanating from your post.
While I would love for you and Hilly to make nice nice for Jes’ sake (’cause honestly, it has no bearing in my world whatsoever), I think it was very brave of you to write this post. I also think it was very brave of Hilly to publicly respond to it.
You are obviously both great people or Jes wouldn’t have befriended either of you.
It should already be inherently obvious how great “I” am…LOL
Keep writing. You have a gift. Truly.
Jerry is one of the greatest, most honest guys in the world………….and an amazing lover…………………I hope you start blogging again on a regular basis!
i wish you’d start writing again!